INTRODUCING MIOBA!!!!! (short for MIchelle OBAma)

On the Cocolah.com development front I will be welcoming three (long overdue) new designers to the Cocolah.com fam in the coming days. STAY TUNED!!!!!! Very exciting.

On the personal development front, after many years of crossing paths with Miss Judith AKA The Hair God, she has graciously agreed to give me lessons.

Miss Judith is on the top of the food chain when it comes to hair. In other words, you have to save your dolla bills for a few months to get your hair done by Miss Thing.

I'm truly honored and hella ella ella eh eh eh excited.

You already know the blog pics are gonna get stupid cus soon my hair is gonna be poppin-er!!!!

I've secretly wanted to do hair since I was a kid but my social and touch anxiety got in the way. True story. (violins please) I've grown to trust and touch and feel and love...uh oh!!!

I feel a song coming on:

Touch me, tease me
Feel me and caress me
Hold on tight and don't let go
Baby I'm about to explode

Case Featuring Foxy Brown

OK OK OK OK OK OK OK OK OK DRUM ROLL PLEASE!!!!!

INTRODUCING MIOBA!!!!!
(short for MIchelle OBAma)

So I've decided to start a series starring Mioba!!!!

You'll get to track my progress!!!

This week's lesson was on highlights, cut and blow dry! Don't she look fabulous!?!?

Ok, so truth is I got fired from the color process cus I was too slow with it...cus I didn't fold the foil properly, cus I didn't brush the color on properly, cus, cus, cus Miss Judith don't play games when it comes to color...that's her thing.

She said, step aside and just watch.

hmph.

I did quite a decent job with the cut doh maybe cus I had a pair of $900 scissors in hand...how could I fail!?!?!? Yeah you read it right. Miss Judith is serious about her craft. Her scissors: $900 My scissors: Straight out a SET from the 99 cent store.

I'm about to be a blow dry master, I can feel it...it came naturally and if you dare make any Dominican jokes I'm coming to find you. No it's not in my blood. NO all Dominican women don't give good blow...dries.

Miss Judith says:

Blow Dry-ist = No Money
Colorist = Big Dollas

SO! Let's all welcome Mioba and Miss Judith to the Cocolah.com family!!!!!

Flip your hair like Marsha Brady!

Seasonal Affective Disorder

OK you know what??? You don't have to tell me I'm slacking on the blog front!!!

I ALREADY KNOW!!!! Thanks for rubbing it in.

My laptop got some act right so we've decided to patch things up and stay together! We're excited to announce that we'll be renewing our vows soon! Stay tuned for the wedding pictures! aaaaawwwww!!!

Secondly, I haven't been feeling so hot so taking pictures is not on the top of my list and I think the winter blues have officially set in.

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say
it's all right

The Beatles

I'm actually considering going to a tanning salon and getting some UV rays.

Don't judge me.

SAD is real. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seasonal_affective_disorder

Cocolah.com JANUARY FASHION CHALLENGE!!!!

You wanna challenge me?! What?!

This is an official statement:

Dapper Dan Michael is my FIRST and one and only thrift partner.

I know....shocking!!!

I have forever and ever thrifted solo. Why cus?

1. I can't take the distraction and I like to take my sweeeeeet ol' time in the store. Rolling through the aisles once, twice, three times a lady making sure I don't miss nothin.

2. I can't stand the competition....I gotta watch the other shoppers and now I gotta watch you too!??! na man...no offense but it's just too stressful!

3. Refer to #2...every man for himself

Dan and I can HANG....we've sat on mountains of clothes and just talked, space travelin' and harassin' each other while the hours pass on by. That's real love right there....real love for clothes that is. It's not like that...chills.

Dan's eye is a little ridiculous when it comes to fit and he doesn't let me buy ANYTHING that I don't need even when I whine, "but ima alter it" or "but I don't have it in THIS color"...he be like "Yah, it's just gonna sit in the pile on the floor of your closet with the rest of the stuff you don't wear."

ewwww!!!

Yeah, he be putting me on BLAST like dat! ALL my bidness in the streets.

So I ran an idea by him...

I've been wanting to ask YOU the reader to CHALLENGE ME.

I've challenged you...now it's your turn.

Send me a piece of clothing that is...let's say offbeat,let's say different to see if "The Yah"

(that'd be ME)

can flip it.

CAN I FLIP IT?!?!? YES I CAN!!!

Nooooooooo, I'm not doing it for free clothes. Now, why would you think a thing like that?!

Lil ol' me!??! Neeevah!!! Come on now!!!

I'm doing it to test my flippin' abilities.

So Dan Michael tosses me a dress and says "start here". It's the Dominican in him he doesn't understand ruff and tumble women who run with wolves...he's also a bit bothered by my hair...and sometimes when I'm talking he stares at it with a confused stare.

It's all good...cus I'm comfortable with my shiet...I knoooooows I look good. okay!?!

ok.

SO! I find this Reiss dress which happens to be in my color palette and the fit is perfect and I know I can rock it with jeans so I'm like this ain't even nothing. Please. Come on now...you gotta come harder than that Dan! Big whoop!

I do feel like I sorta cheated with the jeans and the fact that its not really a girly dress but whatever....a dress is a dress right?!...Ima take what you give me and flip it into my own style any ol way so whateva...yah dig!?

so here's Yah in a dress. But look at my face doh...you know i'll still beat your rass if you cross me right......of course. HA!!!

I accept your challenge.

P.S. The freelance gig is not only allowing me to use they equipment but they paying me to post this. Life is real good.

Words of Wisdom: Pimp the System. Don't let the System Pimp You.

DECEMBER COCOLAH.COM FASHION CHALLENGE WINNER!

Sorry for the delay in posting this but as I stated in my previous post my laptop is acting bougie (as my son would say).

Not sure if it got the memo that this is not only Obamanation but we're in a recession so there is positively no excuse for slacking.

It's like ok...buy a new Macbook so I can stay on my grind or pay my rent so I can stay sheltered. DAAAAYUM homie.
That's the reallah real.

Whatever. I'm (almost, this close, a freelance check away) from getting over her.

When it gets replaced it's gonna try to come cryin' and beggin'...beggin' and cryin'...baby please, baby please........
Story of my life.....sigh. hee heee....

As usual I'll turn my head and say, "no gracias. No exes, no backsies.
No we can't be friends...if we can't be lovahs...we can't be friends.

Take the L out of Lovah....it's OVAH!"

Cocolah.com interrupts the regularly scheduled program to bring you a song dedication.

This is Yah from Inwood I would like to give a shout out to my main man "son" and dedicate this song to my laptop....who got me sitting at the freelance job sneaking a blog on the low...daaaayum.

They ain't have a video so sing it to yourself or reinact it with a partner.
Clear your throat first:

"She Lives In My Lap"
Outkast
(feat. Rosario Dawson)

[Intro: Rosario Dawson]
[laughter]
What's wrong? What are you afraid of?
The Love Below

[Verse 1: Andre 3000]
She stays alone, never sheds a single tear
She stays in the coolest moods, clearly woman of the year
She and all her girlfriends, they go out dressed to win
She comes back to the cooler side of town
but she lives in my lap

[Chorus: Andre 3000]
She lives in my lap [repeat 6X]
Forever my fiance
She lives in my lap
Don't leave, don't stay
She lives in my lap
I'll get the courage one day

[Verse 2: Andre 3000]
Make me want you, make me miss you
make me wonder where you are, then forget you
Girl remind me, just who we are
We're oh so close, but yet so far

[Interlude]
[Rosario Dawson:]
Baby why are you acting like this?
I don't care about any of them...
I care about you!
Baby I Love you!

[Andre 3000:]
You've got me open wide (I love you)
Just Come inside (baby)
It's yours (it's yours)
I'm yours (i'm yours)
For sure (for sure)
Play baby play...

[Chorus + interlude + scratching til fade...]


Siiiiiiiiiigh. Ok. where was I?! OH!!!!
The Fashion Challenge Results!

OK drum roll please!!!!!

The winner is!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DID I NOT SAY IT'S OBAMANATION!?!?
WE ALL WINNNAHS!!!!

To show my SINCERE gratitude for taking out the time and making an effort to submit to the Fashion Challenge Ima go ahead and gift each one of these ladies an exclusive Dirty Roots tshirt, with a hand drawn design by yours truly.
Can't get um no where but here kids.

Thank you ladies!!!! Please email me your address to yah@cocolah.com and it's on its way.

Then we got this Hot Dog who submitted the picture below....not understanding that this is a...FASHION challenge. sigh. And yes English is his first language...so....yo no entiendo.

And...I'm.....back!

Did you miss me?!

I missed me....missed this blogger voice whose sole purpose on this earth is to entertain and enlighten :)

So here's the real deal.

I'm experiencing technical difficulties....I think my Macbook is breaking up with me. I......

I won't get into it cus it's a sensitive subject. Really....I don't know what to do with myself...but everything always works itself out. There's other fish in the sea.

So whatever...siiiiiigh

So I hope to bring you not only your submitted and stolen pictures of your NYE outfits as well as the results of Cocolah.com's December Fashion Challenge in the next few days.

SO! remember that top I was supposed to be making for my NYE outfit. It didn't work...didn't work on many levels. The leather I brought was a little to heavy for the draping the shirt was supposed to have.....so it fell a little stiff. Not good.

Not only that but I ended up making a spur of the moment purchase, the pants in this pic which I do love in a Beatles sorta way but from the start I knew they wouldn't work with the top I had in mind.

I was under pressure ya'll! the store was closing and I loved the pants and figured I'd make them work some way, some how. Besides, they made my butt look REALLY nice..and hey that's priceless so I said, "pants, you coming with me buddy".

I knew I had these Beatle style boots that would work perfectly and figured if I give the band jacket another go...these would be the pants and boots to send the outfit over the edge.

Ok. So the NYE shirt didn't work, the pants didn't work with anything BUT the boots and since my girl Ndada suggested I show more skin...I figure hey! What better way to bring in the new year then to let it all hang out?!

Um...no....off to the fairy closet I go.

AHA...this might work....I picked up this little gem a few months ago, and every time I see it, I smile. I had been waiting for the right occasion to wear this ridiculousness. You have to see it in person, it's of a shiny satin that is as annoying as it is endearing. The buttons on the shirt were black with diamond insets...yeah i know....lol.

Fabulous.

To make the shirt make sense with the pants I replaced the buttons for these gold toned ones.

FYI here is a short list of essential things you should have in your supplies. Needle, thread, random buttons, a good pair of scissor and fusible web for a quick seam repair.

I'll try to put a concise list shortly...that'd be a great blog entry if you ask me.

OK...So check it...

This is my Dynasty look to bring in 2009 in a Dallas sorta way. Mogul (in the making) Status, shoulders thrown back with a bad attitude, like waiting for my butler to assist me with my Mink coat and my chauffeur to open the door of my Bentley, riding downtown sipping on Dom Pérignon. Pinkies up in 2009 bee....yeah. um.....

Ahem.

Happy New Year Daaaarrlin!!!!

Presenting Ms. Yah Carrington

The inspiration

Ms. Alexis Colby (Dynasty)